Part 18. A Little Less Conversation

Blue Stilton pudding with spiced apple purée, Andy The Chip and the Weigh In Shop. Plus, what is Gordon Ramsay's real name?

Oh, before we start, if you could stick a like at the end that would be good. Cheers.

Welcome to Part 18 of errrr, 18. There’s another 17 Parts to catch up on before this one, so hurry up, get your skates on.

Right, first thing, and it’s quick, we got ourselves a website. At the time, 2005, there were lots of companies fighting to get your business, I mean, you can do your own website these days, but back then, you had to call in the big lads, or lasses.

So, often leaflets were on the doormat, offering website design services, we ignored them because dealing with them took time and effort, and we were knackered. But one day a young chap was eating at the restaurant, and he told Donna that he was a student at York University, and he did web design.

So that’s that, he did our website for us. He got our thinking as well which helped.Simple. Did it do anything positive for us? Don’t know, we just had a website, because you were supposed to have one. By the way, he was called James, and his then girlfriend, was called Emi, and they did website work for us for many years. Not very exciting really, which goes to show how unimportant a website was back then.

Hi to James and Emi!

OK, something else we needed to cross off the list, we needed a better veg supplier. There was nothing wrong with the one we were using, and most restaurants were using this particular company, but we wanted better.

Now, Google was only a bairn back then, so to gather information, you had to talk to people, real people. So we did just that, over the course of several days we popped into the other shops and restaurants on our little cobbled street, Swinegate. We hoped they could help.

First one on the list to visit was the fish and chip shop, owned by Andy. We called him Andy The Chip. Weirdly, whenever you talked to him, he would be menacingly sharpening his filleting knife on a steel while he stared at you!

So anyway, did Andy The Chip know any other veg suppliers that did any special ingredients? No he didn’t, he was mainly interested in spuds, but he was a good business man, so a useful contact.

Next on the visit list was the Chinese restaurant, which was opposite us. We didn’t know who owned it, but there was guy who worked there, who’s job, it seemed, was to stand outside the restaurant, wearing tight black trousers and a crisp white shirt, and smoke lots and lots of cigarettes.

Then at around 11pm, when people came out of the pubs, he waited on tables. He also used to wave and wink at Donna and Tricky Vicki from across the street, while he was smoking, which they thought was a bit cheeky.

Also, this guy had thick black shiny hair, so I decided to call him Cheeky Little Elvis. Did Cheeky Little Elvis know of any special vegetables suppliers? No, in fact he didn’t even seem interested in trying to think of any, he just replied, “No”, in a very gruff voice. Probably all the fags. Fair enough Cheeky Little Elvis, have another ciggy.

Also, there was a sushi restaurant two doors down, it was called Buzz Bar, and it was owned by Simon. We liked him, Sushi Simon was a chatterbox, and a little giggler. Now, he couldn't think of anyone, but he would ask around for us. Thanks Sushi Simon. We weren’t doing very well, we needed Google.

We even took a a trip around the corner to the Weigh In shop, you know those places, you can buy twenty seven grammes of plain flour, and a kilo of marrowfat peas. The Weigh In Girls were always friendly and helpful, they could get you things. You need tapioca, third drum from the back, organic spelt flour, no problem, it’s coming tomorrow, rectangular lentils, next to the purple sugar. But no info from them.

So, neither Andy The Chip, the Weigh In Girls, Sushi Simon, or Cheeky Little Elvis had any answers for us.

However, look and thee shall find. One day a van passed us, we won’t give the real name of the company, which was written on the van, so lets call them Local Stuff. We made a mental note and when we arrived at Vanilla Black we popped down to see Sushi Simon to ask if he knew them. He wasn't around, but his Underboss was, and he was very well connected.

Nic, or Knowledgeable Nic, was a good lad, so we asked if he knew Local Stuff. He immediately picked up the phone and called someone. After a few mumbles, and a few hand gestures, he put the phone down and told us that he’d spoken to a guy, and this guy told him, that they were a decent supplier.

Sorted, we had the details of a new veg supplier, but also, we had made contact with some local traders, they were nice people, they were good fellas.

But something else interesting came out of these chats with the locals. When we told them all how busy we were, they were surprised. Imagine that, a vegetarian restaurant being busy. How could that happen!! What, you doubted us? No rolling of your eyes now is there?!

Anyway, we contacted Local Stuff straight away, and they said one of their people would pop out in a few days time to see us. Not sure why they wanted to see us, why the fuss, they had food, we wanted to buy it, what else is to do. So we would have to see.

Well, it was still busy, lunches were picking up and evenings were crazy, and to add to it all, people started contacting us about Valentine’s Day. Eh? We hadn’t even thought about Valentine’s Day, and they were asking about special menus. So you see, it’s relentless, it was like a snowball, getting bigger and faster all the time. We couldn't keep up with the day to day tasks, then more and more were coming at us.

So the only thing you can actually do in busy stressful situations is…….mess about.

So me and our Keanu messed about. We decided that our fake member of the team, Tony Cannelloni, used to work for Gordon Ramsay. In fact, he was quite a senior member of Gordon’s crew. And luckily for us, Tony Cannelloni wanted to give us lots and lots of gossip. Thanks Tony, give us the dirt.

Me, “Hey, Keanu, Tony Cannelloni was telling me that when he worked for Gordon, Robbie Williams was their kitchen porter”.

Our Keanu, “Wow! Well actually, Tony Cannelloni told me that Gordon Ramsay’s real name is Gordon Ramrod”.

Obviously we tried to out do each other.

Me, “Well I didn’t know that. Actually, Tony Cannelloni told me that when he worked at Gordon’s restaurant, Gwen Stefani was a frequent customer, and when it came to dessert, she used to turn it down, but instead would have a little stroke of Gordon’s hair”.

Our Keanu, “That’s odd. Funny you should say that. Tony Cannelloni told me that when he worked for Gordon, he arrived to work early one day and found Gordon and Simon Cowell wrestling on the restaurant floor”.

And the stupidity continued.

Me, “Oh that would be funny to watch. Actually, Tony Cannelloni told me that Gordon actually has jet black hair, but he brushes Domestos through it every morning because he wants to look like Billy Idol”.

And so on!

-We’ve put this little button here, just in case you think we’re worth it.-

It’s these moments, or hours, of madness that keep you going in heavy, busy, crazy situations. Some working in hospitality become stressed and aggressive, some have a few beers, some do a line of cocaine, some shut down, and some become a bit unhinged. I was the last of that list.

Anyhow, the chap from Local Stuff arrived a few days later to chat about food. We liked him, but can’t remember his name, so lets go with Richard. Local Richard brought a box of goodies with him, free goodies. There were loads of vegetables, plus yoghurts and cheese in this box. We were surprised to see dairy, and when we asked why, Local Ricco explained the situation.

Local Stuff wasn’t just a vegetable supplier, what they did was collect various foodstuffs from local producers throughout Yorkshire. That meant meat and fish, which we didn't need, vegetables, fruit, dairy and so on. They were basically a distributor of local stuff. And hence the box of goodies, Local Ricco was setting his stall out.

You see, a lot of small producers had popped up after the BSE (mad cow disease) situation, government grants were used to compensate those farmers badly affected. So many diversified. This was good for us, creamy goats milk yoghurt, locally grown rhubarb, fancy heritage potatoes and veg straight from the soil.

I was hooked on local produce.

But it didn’t last for long.

Here we go. Local produce is great isn’t it?

Why? Well, it hasn’t travelled as far, it tastes better, it’s better for the environment, it helps local businesses.

But hang on, let’s say you bought carrots from a farm which was ten miles away, but there were was another farm growing much better carrots, which are organic, and cheaper, but they were eleven miles away, which do you choose?

Or, you buy carrots from a grower who’s five miles away, but you find out that they keep them in cold storage for long periods of time. However, there's  another grower, who’s ten miles away, who can guarantee to have the carrots out of the ground and in your sweaty hands within twenty four hours. Which do you choose? You get the point don’t you?

Well here’s a little story. At the time, 2005, the public, due to the media, were becoming fixated on local produce, so you had to have local gear on the menu.

Anyway, a delivery arrived to Vanilla Black one day, when I went through it, I found that the rhubarb was in pretty bad condition. It was local, so in theory it shouldn't have been. And this happened often.

Did the usual thing and rang up to complain, then ran over to M&S to get some more, which wasn’t from the local area.

These are the things which make the day harder, these are the little incidents which happen behind the scenes. As the diner, you don’t see them, but you are annoyed when a certain item isn’t on the menu, and so are the restaurant owners, but often, it didn't even arrive to the restaurant, or it did and it was rotten.

Anyway, I was doing some prep in the kitchen and Donna had popped out for something or other. A lady walked in and asked to book a table for that evening. I opened the diary and was just about to take a few details when she asked, “Do you use local produce?”. I told her that some of the produce was local, but some wasn’t. She screwed up her face a little. And that was my cue.

I asked her to wait a moment, I went to the kitchen and brought out two sticks of rhubarb. I held one stick in each hand, one was upright, the stick in the  other hand was drooped, almost doubled over. I asked her which one she wanted, obviously we know the answer. So I told her that her chosen stick was from the south of England, and the drooped rhubarb stick was local. I asked her again, which one she wanted. She didn't answer me. Instead, she looked back at the diary, and gave me her booking details. There we go.

There are more stories about local produce, but we’ll keep them as ace cards for when someone gives us a dig because we disrespected the Holy Grain of local produce.

But look, the moral of the story is this, just because it’s local, doesn't always mean it’s the best. That’s not to say we didn’t have local produce on the drinks or food menu we were just very selective.

Then Tony Cannelloni told us that when he worked for Gordon Ramsay, all the staff were forced to grow mushrooms in their armpits because Mr. Ramrod wanted his produce to be very very local.

Right ho, a recipe for you. By the way, if you ever make any of these dishes, stick a pic on social media and we’ll mention you in the story, somehow.

Baked Blue Cheese Pudding with Spiced Apple Purée

You may remember, if you’ve been following properly, that on Part 17 we bought a cookery book which gave us lots of inspiration. Well, the inspiration process from the book was in full swing at this time, but sometimes not as you would expect. Right, on our dessert menu there was no cheese board, this was deliberate, desserts are sweet, a cheese board isn’t, so go away. Plus, they're a bit dull, maybe they should be re-named Cheese Bored. But people sometimes questioned this, it was obviously ingrained in their habit bank. So, they got a cheese bored, but in a different form. And hence this dish, as you can see, blue cheese, apple and some grapes, well, red wine.

There you go, have your cheese bored, as a main course.

BUT, this pudding is way better when it’s made the day before then re heated as required. I mean, you can use it when it comes out of the oven, but it will need about 25 minutes to settle otherwise it’ll be difficult to cut.

Contains dairy and gluten. Serves four or five. Oven pre heated at 180c or 160c fan or gas 4. Hey, you know what, you can actually do this with Cheddar instead of blue cheese. So many options. You’re so lucky.

Ingredients

400g Cream, double or whipping, either is ok.

4 eggs

180g fine white breadcrumbs

375g Blue Stilton, crumbled. Actually any blue cheese will work. Hey, maybe try something local!!!

1tsp Salt. Doesn't sound much but your cheese is salty

For the apple.

2 medium Apples, those with a bit of a blush, Coxs, Braeburn or Gala

150g Red wine

4 Cloves

8 Black peppercorns

½ tsp Salt

½ tsp Sugar

Method

-Beat the eggs well, add the whipping cream and breadcrumbs and mix.

-Fold in the cheese and salt

-Add to a loaf tin (20cm by 10cm by 8cm) which has been lined with greaseproof and bake for 45 minutes, or until puffed up and golden.

-Allow to cool, it needs some time to set, about 25 minutes.

-For the apple. Peel and core the two apples, BUT, add these bits to a sauce pan.

-Add the red wine, cloves and peppercorns to the pan. Bring to a boil, turn to a simmer, then hold that simmer for 30 seconds. Turn off and let infuse.

-Now, slice the apples very thinly. Remove the apple core, skin, peppercorns and cores from the pan. Then add the thin slices of apple.

-Simmer the spiced wine and stir the apples frequently. You’ll find that the wine won’t cover the apple, but don't worry.

-Keep stirring until the apple becomes soft, if they aren't, and the wine has disappeared, add a drop of water.

-Once the apple is well cooked, continue with the simmer until the wine has almost disappeared.

-Now, use a stick blender and blend the apples until smooth. Add the sugar and salt. Cool and refrigerate.

-As mentioned above, it’s better to let it cool, refrigerate then re heat the next day. Slice, then heat the slices for about 15 -20 minutes at 180c in the oven. Or, as I did, sliced it around 1.5cm to 2cm thick and fry gently on both sides until golden and heated through.

Join us next time because we say more things.